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Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The Great Pacifier Hunt

They look innocent enough don't they? Harmless little bits of plastic and silicone to keep a baby soothed and happy. HAH! They are the bane of a parent's existence. I'm told that eventually I'll trade this bane for sippy cups, but as that is a battle not won yet I'm going to burn that bridge when I get to it.

I spend the evenings and mornings looking for one of these little guys so that Autumn can sleep or will be able to nap at daycare. I've found them in the bottom of the dishwasher (apparently she was helping to unload it), under the couch (her new favorite hiding place for small things), under the mattress in her bed, behind the dresser, in the sink, in the bathroom wastebasket, the floor of the car, in my pockets, in the bottom, of course, of the diaper bag, under the pew at church, in my purse and school bags, in shoes, in the cat's water or food dish, etc.

I have learned to never give a pacifier without attaching it to the baby with a pacifier clip. This way when the pacifier is spit out it doesn't end up on a nasty floor and is not usable again for the near future.

The very interesting thing about pacifiers is that they are magical. They have the ability to just vanish. We know that there is a portal under our refigerator or stove to the lost cat toy dimension; the portal for the lost pacifier dimension is somewhere in the vicinity of Autumn, where ever she happens to be. They also have the ability to appear out of thin air. I have put Autumn in her car seat with no pacifier anywhere close to her, when we have reached our destination and get her out of the car she has one in her mouth. So either the pacifiers are magical or Autumn is.

Autumn only likes the slant nipple ones otherwise known as the orthodontic nipples. She knows when they are right side up and upside down. Pacifiers are tradable. Autumn and a friend of hers trade their pacifiers with each other willy-nilly. They just go up to each other and "ssplip" they pull each other's out and then "ploop" suck on it themselves. They share little germies this way too, how nice that they are learning to share.

Did you also know that pacifiers can multiply and comfort babies without being sucked on? I'll put Autumn to bed with one pacifier and in the morning she'll have one in her mouth and one in each hand. HUH?!?! Where did they come from? Now seriously, don't you think that someone in the The Misuse of Magic Department or The Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Department would have noticed this phenomenon?

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